User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 14 of 14

Thread: What makes me cold.

  1. #1
    Newbie MC-Snoop's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Chi-Town
    Posts
    47

    What makes me cold.

    Yo yo yo i want to tell everybody, who the new mc around here is so check this out.....

    yo yo yo hear my flow
    its too cold
    for u hoes
    that just do not know how to show
    any respect for the man
    that just fights wit big man
    throws ur head through the window
    and leaves ur wife living single
    just cause u had to say the wrong words
    cause thats how i am i suppose
    im representing all the gangstas in chitown foe
    if u didnt like this fuck it i dont want more war though
    its already too much what i got on the streets
    tryin to suvive from shots hidin behind trees
    and cops dont like me for smokin trees
    im sorry i aint worth it


    hey well i think this one was dumb but FUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    oh and hey im new!!! what do i need to know? lol

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Re. Says. P. Says.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Groove City
    Age
    33
    Posts
    562
    Battle Record
    0-1
    man ill try to keep this positive since you new...


    well wha you need to do is go to the help section down at the bottom of the main page and read as much as you can. Read about Multies, internals, mets. and sims. for this um.... verse ... you used a real weak flow , you only ryhmed last words, and most of it didnt make any sense BUT that not what matters, what matters is that you check out the help section man for real

    if u didnt like this fuck it i dont want more war though

    uh i guess this is alright ......... more and war ryhme...... but uh..... just do waht i said and keep spittin

    payce.

  3. #3
    Newbie MC-Snoop's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Chi-Town
    Posts
    47
    lol yea alright thanks for the help. its cause im just begining to do this lol




    Quote Originally Posted by Re. Says. P. Says.
    man ill try to keep this positive since you new...


    well wha you need to do is go to the help section down at the bottom of the main page and read as much as you can. Read about Multies, internals, mets. and sims. for this um.... verse ... you used a real weak flow , you only ryhmed last words, and most of it didnt make any sense BUT that not what matters, what matters is that you check out the help section man for real

    if u didnt like this fuck it i dont want more war though

    uh i guess this is alright ......... more and war ryhme...... but uh..... just do waht i said and keep spittin

    payce.

  4. #4
    ninjaboy
    Guest
    uhhh... what he said.... nah man, it's obvious u new. u did a few things wrong here, first off your flow was not. i mean, i started to feel it but then it changed. it's probably not a good idea to change the feel of your flow on a piece this short. second you used the same word to rhyme, twice, that's kind of a no no. you only want to do that when the word before it rhymes such as:
    "keep out of rap stick with being a trash MAN
    or better yet, maybe workin as a gas Man"
    obviously that was weak, but it was just an example ya check, but keep it up. read the help section, and post again, that's all anyone can do right? oh yeah, and hit me up at: http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...73#post1926673

  5. #5
    ninjaboy
    Guest
    oh, yeah, and post links to two open mics you've left feedback on.
    Last edited by ninjaboy; December 22nd, 2004 at 04:27 PM Reason: double post

  6. #6
    Newbie MC-Snoop's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Chi-Town
    Posts
    47
    well first of all, i had a whole new thing right here u know the reply thing, but then i read the if you think you smart, pres ctrl+W thingy and i pressed it and lol it all got erased. and yea i went to the help section and i got some tips right now. so thanks yall ill come back wit something better i promise!


    oh yea i forgot what u mean wit leaving the links for the two feedbacks

  7. #7
    www.theilleffect.com djb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    folsom ca
    Age
    38
    Posts
    3,086
    Battle Record
    7-6
    yeah you got to elevate a lil bit, but dont stress everybody starts out like this. i dont have time right now cuz i gotta go off to work, but pm me and i will give you a real nice breakdown of this and give you some pointers. also i see some real potential pm me and lets get a collab. in the mean while can you peep my om.

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=161742
    Follow at
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

    Music --->>>>
    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  8. #8
    deine mutter BeRLin`S BesT's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Berlin City
    Posts
    896
    Battle Record
    6-1
    mmhhhh what makes me cold is standin' in a blizzard in just my leopard skin thong....just thought I'd share me experiences....ELEVATE...pz
    Hit N Run

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  9. #9
    LiTeSknBaby F.A.M.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    S.O.U.T.H.
    Posts
    915
    Battle Record
    11-8
    ok i cant str8 diss ya shit cuz its wrong,,some constructive cristism homie stick to tryin to be a gangsta an dodgin them "bullet"s cuz rappin aint for everybody,,,aight its love

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  10. #10
    Banned
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Mifflinburg, PA
    Posts
    6,693
    Battle Record
    12-1
    You need to leave 2 links to 2 open mics that you left decent feedback on or this closed, Thanks.

  11. #11
    your fuckin gay

    $ DOT FAT





  12. #12
    The True Psycho of RB
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    My Own Mind
    Age
    40
    Posts
    3,164
    Battle Record
    1-0
    i aint gonna hate cause your new, this was just average the flow and structure was off you just need to keep writing and experimenting with flows and you'll improve.

  13. #13
    Dune Methane CrazyCarl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Age
    36
    Posts
    1,866
    Battle Record
    3-0
    You need to work on your rhyming. The best way to do that is to keep writing. It'll be good for you to check out the help section and learn about structure.
    Check mine out "Diss Voice."

  14. #14

    Re: What makes me cold.

    I liked it. However, it was just average the flow and structure was off you just need to keep writing and experimenting..
    - Edward with https://www.elkgrovetrees.com

Similar Threads

  1. Cold Cold World.. feat. PoizonusJK
    By Iglosone in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: August 9th, 2010, 02:09 PM
  2. What makes RB...RB?..
    By RXL in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: September 30th, 2008, 04:55 PM
  3. This makes me think of most of you. .
    By Baxter D. Wall in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: June 18th, 2007, 12:44 PM
  4. what makes a g
    By DixonButts in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: March 24th, 2003, 09:27 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •