Schizophrenia
Dear A Disciple,
I see that you’re talking…
But information coming just a little too slow
But yo… that was low - a low so low I refuse to go..
There really are some things that I do need to know
I’m not that thirsty and nah I don’t wanna be “in” so bad
Just looking for a reason and some security…
Something that’s been way too long since I’ve had
I’m so mad and at the same time still so sad
“But what If you had one wish…” would it make it all be so bad?
Dear CLA919,
IDK how Pac would feel if he was here today
I feel like I let him down and now I feel some type of way
Would they love me or hate me if I exposed my whole heart
I didn’t mean to though and it wasn’t about playing some part
Cause like from the start… I didn’t have to be this crazy
Infra red green to my head and I was so gone that shit didn’t even phase me
But I’m a soulja, and being a soulja is something that come from the heart
And believe me dawg it’s any thing but easy so stay head strong and play smart
AD,
I don’t know the way records sell – but I know 12 years of past
And how many times I fell… and how hope never last
And most of it was ugly
Nothing… I get nothing so now they ask me to call it
4:20am – ask me who he was going to go play ball with
If there is one sense learned what would that be?
When I fight with you- I can’t stand the feeling inside of me
CLA919,
If I had to go one way… and BOOM
Another firework just went off… but I’m not just “concealed in my room”
I’m not talking from the cradle in the womb to the marker on my tomb
I’m talking all the other shit and learned to never assume
He sent me a text today that said I better clean out his boys
It made me think for a second about it another way…
and thought I can’t get pregnant if I just go back to toys
AD,
They just made abortion illegal today and from my own entrance I should be so happy
But then I wonder what happens when it’s rape and how fucked up that’d be
And nah I never asked for this walk… and nah I’m not just talking the talk
Just got de ja vu like a mother fucker… that’s twice today
But I’m used to how a dead man walk only I’m not so good at hearing what they say
Every letter I write, it’s practically always to you
So I guess I’m just reaching out again cause I have a decision to make and don’t know what to do.
Reply With Quote
